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Steps to becoming a legal guardian in Illinois
Within some child custody situation, there may be a disabled child who will need an appointed legal guardian after they become of legal age. He or she may not be able to navigate daily living on their own, and will need someone who can be responsible for helping facilitate certain measures. If this is not addressed within the original custody order itself, an application for guardianship will need to be filed once the child becomes an adult.
The state of Illinois has what is known as The Office of the State Guardian, operating under the Guardianship and Advocacy Commission. The state also carries one of the most unique and progressive guardianship laws in the country, meaning that there is substantial assistance available in a guardianship situation.
There are two types of guardianships, “guardian of person” and “guardian of estate.” Guardian of a person will address issues such as medical treatment decisions, place of residence for the disabled person, social services, and any other matters that arise in which the person would be unable to manage. However, it does not give the guardian the right to manage finances of the ward. If a person needs help making financial decision or managing finances, then a guardian of the estate will be appointed as well.
Dealing with unexpected changes in the custody schedule
Your ex needs to pick the kids up on Friday night — instead of Saturday morning when the custody agreement says that their parenting time starts. They’re planning a big weekend trip with the kids, and they tell you that they need to get an early start. Do you allow it?
If you refuse, you might be called “unreasonable.” Too many refusals over minor requests can make you look hostile and unwilling to work with your ex in your children’s best interests. This can be very problematic in court if your ex decides to challenge the current custody plan.
However, you don’t want your ex to simply expect that you’ll bend over backwards to accommodate their every whim — particularly if your ex is the “if you give them an inch, they’ll take a mile” sort. You also don’t want the disruption to your life and routine that comes with every request (including the extra phone calls or messages from your ex).
One method you can use to manage these kinds of issues is to have a clause in your custody agreement that limits how many times your ex can make these kinds of requests for unscheduled changes. For example, you may freely allow an hour or two of leeway around each custody exchange — but limit the number of times bigger changes to the routine can be requested to just three times a year.
Why can’t a prenup address child custody?
You’re getting married, and you decide to use a prenup to protect your assets and/or protect yourself from your spouse’s debt. If you get divorced, you know how things are going to play out financially.
During this process, you bring up children. You know that you want to have a family in the future. You do not want to live with the fear that a divorce could mean your children go live with your ex, and you never see them. You ask if you can put any details about future child custody rights into the prenup, and you find out that you cannot. Why is this?
While the court does consider the specifics of every individual case, they have one main goal that they always focus on: determining what is in a child’s best interests. This is even more important than giving the parents what they want. If the court decides that some other solution would be better for the children, then it works toward that end.
Those future children are people, after all, and they have rights. If a prenup could make it so that they wouldn’t get the best living situation or would get cut off from a parent against their will, that would violate their rights. The parents can only use the prenup to make decisions for and about themselves, not for or about other people. For this reason, children are exempt and nothing regarding custody will hold up in divorce court.
What are the benefits of an uncontested divorce?
An uncontested divorce can provide a variety of different benefits, including saving the couple time, money and acrimony. As a result, it is helpful for divorcing couples to understand what makes a divorce uncontested.
What is an uncontested divorce?
An uncontested divorce is essentially a divorce that is not disputed by either of the spouses. When a couple has made the difficult decision to divorce, the process usually begins with one of the spouses filing for divorce. Following that filing, the other spouse has a certain period of time to respond to the divorce filing with their answer. If the divorcing couple agrees on divorce-related issues such as property division, spousal support, child support, child custody, or do not share children from the marriage, they may be able to enjoy an uncontested divorce process.
Benefits of an uncontested divorce
An uncontested divorce is a more streamlined process as opposed to a divorce that is contested. During a contested divorce, each disputed issue must be litigated in divorce court. This can make the divorce process more time-consuming, costly and acrimonious. When the divorcing couple does not have financial disputes, and both spouses agree to the divorce, an uncontested divorce may be the best option for them.
Working through property division in an Illinois divorce
It is difficult to say exactly what the hardest part of the divorce process is, but the reality is that all divorcing couples in Illinois and elsewhere are dealing with changes because of the process. Not only are they moving forward with being single, but they are also leaving the marriage with roughly half of what they enjoyed during the marriage. Property division can evolve into a high conflict topic, especially when each spouse states a claim for specific property. Thus, it is important to not only understand the property division law specific to the state of Illinois but also what steps are necessary to prove that specific property is in fact personal and separate property.
The state of Illinois is an equitable distribution state. This means that property will be divided between spouses in a fair manner, which often means that it will not be an equal split. In couples where there is a higher earning spouse and a lower earning spouse, it is likely that the higher earner will get a greater percentage than the lower earner.
Divorce is like bankruptcy: A fresh start
Have you ever heard someone refer to bankruptcy as a fresh start? It’s a chance to get rid of the debt that has been weighing you down. Yes, the process itself might be hard, but you get to eliminate that debt and start over. There is a freedom in that that can be very refreshing.
If you’re getting divorced and you’re not sure how to feel about it, it may be wise to look at it the same way. Your marriage is what has been weighing you down. It has been holding you back. The divorce can be that fresh start. The process may be stressful at times, but you can get through it and you can move forward with your life.
For instance, one woman said that she was not good at self-care when she was married. Getting divorced forced her to think about it more and she took positive steps forward. She started caring for herself properly. In the end, she wound up feeling happier than she had during the marriage. Getting out of it was the boost she needed.
Of course, the fresh start is even more obvious if you’re trapped in a marriage with a lot of issues. Maybe your spouse creates a lot of debt for the family and you never have enough money. Maybe he or she is emotionally abusive and now you’re struggling with depression. Living like this is difficult and draining, but the divorce may show you how you can start over and find a better lifestyle ahead.
Can just one spouse file for divorce?
If you want to get divorced and your spouse does not, do you need to get them to agree to the split before you file? With marriage, you both have to agree and sign the marriage contract together. Is that how it works with divorce?
It’s not. Thanks to the "no-fault" divorce laws, only one person has to file. In fact, some have argued that, if it feels like divorce is imminent, it is better to file before your spouse does. That sometimes gives one spouse a tactical advantage by having a plan and obliging the other spouse to either agree or propose a viable alternative.
In short, if you want a divorce, you can divorce your spouse. It does not matter if they also want a divorce or if they want to stay together. You’re free to listen to them if you want — they may suggest trying counseling before splitting up, for instance — but you're under no obligation to stay in an unhappy marriage. You can simply go file for divorce on your own and move through the process as you see fit.
Who gets ownership of pets in a divorce?
About 84.9 million families own a pet across the country—that accounts for about 67% of households. Owners spend billions of dollars on their pets, with the amount increasing steadily over the year. Most people consider their pet an integral part of their family, giving it the love and care they would a child. This is why they fight custody battles in divorces over their pets similar to they would their children.
Divorce is not easy for any one and much has been said about how custody battles over children are drawn out and cause emotional devastation. However, not as much as the equally difficult and drawn out pet custody battle. More than a quarter of lawyers have noticed an increase in the number of couples fighting over family pets in court. It may come as no surprise then to hear that Illinois is one of the handful of states that has passed laws to take a pet’s wellbeing into account during property division.
While many laws exist to ensure a child’s best interests are kept in mind during the divorce, the same consideration is not afforded to pets. Most states treat pets as property during a divorce, and therefore do not take into account any emotional attachment or wellbeing when deciding who gets custody of the pet. Therefore, most pets end up going to the person who paid for him or her. Illinois however differs in their approach, allowing courts to take into account the wellbeing of the animal, setting up temporary and permanent custody and also visitation.
Don’t underestimate the value of being a father
Far too often in our society, the importance of fathers is overlooked. In fact, the law seems to favor mothers over fathers when it comes to child custody decisions. While this may be justifiable in some circumstances, in others it is wholly unfair. But to get to the heart of the matter you have to understand the impact an active father can have on a child’s life.
There are many ways that a father can positively influence his child. By playing an active role, a father can increase his child’s ability to build healthy relationships and confidence. Some studies have even shown that children who have an active father in their life develop better problem-solving skills. A father can decrease the chances that his child will engage in risky behavior later down the road, and a father’s presence can even lead to an increased likelihood that a child will go to college.
An active father can have a tremendous impact on a child’s mental health, too. Those children who have an active father in their life are less likely to develop psychological problems. One study has even shown that children to lean on their fathers more when it comes to dealing with social issues, which arguably could mean that fathers can help alleviate the anxiety associated with social pressures. And all of that is just the start of a father’s impact.
Resources for domestic violence victims in Illinois
Did you know that in Illinois, more than 1 in 3 women and more than 1 in 4 men have been victims of domestic violence? The statistics are similar for the whole of the country. Everyone should have the right to feel safe in their home.
Fortunately, there is a wealth of helpful resources if you or someone you know is suffering from domestic violence. Most of these websites have escape buttons so that you can clear your screen if someone asks what you are doing.
Illinois domestic violence resources
- Illinois Domestic Violence Hotline: You can call this number to seek confidential advice or report domestic violence, (877) 863-6338.
- The Illinois Coalition Against Domestic Violence: These are the people sticking up for your rights in Illinois. They tackle domestic violence by advocating for policies and training professionals who work with survivors. There is a lot of useful information on their site, including a list of resources.
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